Jesus lusts me?

I have made no secret about my job as a collector. Most of my day is spent leaving stupid messages on peoples machines that they will go and delete later. Part of the fun of my job is hearing the original voicemail messages and ringtones people choose to use.

I have come accross some fun ones, but one today struck my funny bone.

After telling me what to do after the beep, the lady says “And remember, He is PASSIONATE for you….”

First off it is pretty scary to tell your bill collector that someone is passionate for them….

I am still unsure of who HE is…. but apparently someone is passionate for me…. of course my husband is when it’s not Thanksgiving week…. but how would this strange person I don’t even know how passionate he is for me????

So I realized she must mean Jesus… maybe. But still…. Passionate? I got images of the bearded man in a robe giving me bedroom eyes and I about fell to the floor convulsing about what may come next…. That was my spiritual moment of the year.

What an interesting choice of words….passionate. So, I was told by a complete stranger, that Jesus lusts me. Great. It’s hard enough to fight off the ugly men, but the holy one as well?

Remember He is PASSIONATE for you…. lol!

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3 Responses

  1. I really can’t blame Jesus. You’re kinda hot . . . 😉

  2. SpatulaHandle, I was thinking the same thing. 😛 That is funny.

  3. “Jesus lusts me this I know, someone answering machine told me so, this just really creeps me out….yes, Jesus lusts me, yes Jesus lusts me. yes, Jesus lusts me, someones answering machine told me soooooo.” LOL Couldn’t help it…you started it with that title and that just what came to mind.

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